I want to share a story with you.
This is the story of one of my clients, Will.
Life for Will felt pretty tough a few years ago.
He was 35 years old.
He was working 14-16 hours per day and feeling stressed out.
He was really unhealthy – Bad skin, bad diet, drinking loads of coffee to stay awake during the day, fat gut and looked at least 10 years older.
At the weekends he was then getting drunk. He used alcohol as a way to numb his reality.
Then he would get ill as he had a persistent chronic stomach condition that kept flaring up.
Will and his wife had 2 children that were 5 and 3 respectively.
He had been with his wife Debbie for 15 years and that spark had faded a little bit.
His solution to all of this was to work harder, work longer and blame the high mortgage costs and car loans for having to work as hard as he was doing...but really he was just running away.
He was using work as a way to just block out the problems and the challenges that were facing him at home. Using work as a reason NOT to sort himself out and get fit.
“I just didn’t have the time, right?”
The result of all of this?
He was disconnected from his wife and children.
He was distant.
Even when he was physically with them, his mind was elsewhere. He was never actually present with them.
He wasn’t being the father and husband that deep down he knew he wanted to be.
It was eating him up inside.
And so his solution to this was to drink more.
From memory what he said it was mainly beer (those large 660ml bottles of Peroni or Stella) or Jack Daniels – sometimes both. Even on a week night!
No wonder he looked a mess.
It’s Not What he Wanted
The strange thing about this situation though was that he knew he didn’t want to be acting like this.
He knew that it was ruining his marriage.
He knew that he would not get this time again with his young children.
He was wasting it.
Yet… he carried on.
The Turning Point
Then two things happened back in 2014 that changed everything.
He went to try on a new pair of suit trousers from Marks & Spencer.
He found the suit that he liked and went to try it on.
To his surprise the 36″ trousers that he took in were too small.
He had to buy a 38″!
Then within about 48 hours he saw some holiday photos that had been developed by his parents of when they were on holiday with them.
He was playing with his daughter in one of them and he didn’t recognise himself.
He had turned into a fat and old looking dad.
All of a sudden he didn’t feel his age. He felt much older.
He looked at the smile on his daughter’s face in the photo and it dawned on him that he wasn’t being the inspirational role model that he had always dreamt of being for his children.
That was it.
Time to change.
What a Journey!
It’s then been one hell of a journey since.
Within 9 months he had become super fit.
Got rid of his beer gut.
Stopped the unhealthy habits and literally transformed into a completely different guy.
He loved it so much.
He was able to fit in to the clothes he wanted to wear, he felt more confident, had energy throughout the day and he was able to keep up with his children without getting out of breath.….and he has not looked back since.
He now has the most amazing relationship with his children. When he is with them he is really with them – he’s not thinking about other things.
He prioritizes them.
His productivity improved so he was working less hours but getting more work done, so he no longer was having to stay late at work or work weekends. He had more time for his family so he could watch his son’s football team play on a Sunday.
Like it or not, your children will model your behaviours. Good or bad.
His children see him day to day.
The way that he looks after himself.
The way that he eats.
The way that he now speaks to his wife.
The way that these things rub off on the people closest to him, plus the impact that he is now having on other people’s lives inspires them to do the same.
Then there is the relationship that he has with his wife Debbie. They have now been together 19 years and he says it feels like they get on better now than ever before.
They share their dreams, aspirations and work together to achieve them.
They have weekends away together and behave like they are still 20.
They just have loads of fun together and make each other laugh.
This has all happened since he made that decision.
Since the day that he had that ‘wake up call.’
The day that he decided to start actually taking care of his body and his health and actually waking up in the morning with a spring in his step rather than just hitting snooze and rolling over.
Was it easy?
Has it been expensive?
Has it saved his marriage and the relationship he had with his children?
Now some reading this will probably be thinking “that’s a bit dramatic – putting everything down to just getting healthy.”
The thing is, it’s not just about getting healthy.
It’s what getting healthy then leads on to.
Getting really healthy meant that his wife started to also get really healthy.
Starting to care about how he looked and acted meant that those around him did the same.
Starting to set goals and achieving them inspired others to do the same.
Then investing the time to reconnect with his wife has meant that she has then wanted to do the same in return.
Is there a secret to all of this?
It’s just a case of following a certain programme and being held accountable along the way.
For the last 8 years I’ve been helping men over 30, just like Will, do the same.
If any of this resonates with you, and you’re stuck in a rut with your health & fitness I urge you to get in touch for a no obligation FREE Transformation Session with me.
I will give you some actionable tips that you can put into practice right away.
If it’s time, it’s time.
Start Your Transformation.